Wrong side of bed.....or maybe it was the right?

OK, TOTW Golf Classic is past and now I can focus on pure basic blogging....trouble was, I had nothing to blog about!   Well, that all changed this morning.....afte, I guess, not enough sleep I woke up quite grumpy this morning. Grump enough that I clearly realized a few things bothering me lately.......you might find them petty, but we all have our nuances.

1. CHARITIES/FUNDRAISERS outside of the Georgetown Walmart:                                         What seems like a daily occurrence now has become a pain in the arse. Whether it's Girl Scouts, Salvation Army, Some Damn Softball Travel Ball Team, Black Church youth group, etc... it has become a regular thing. Just once I'd like to go shopping without someone yelling "Sir" "Sir", or some punk with a backwards hat on asking you to donate to a charity you never heard of before, nor do you even know it's for real!   You know, I wasn't the one who decided their precious little 10 year old had to play "Travel Ball" and go to some tournament 3 hours away every "F'ing" weekend from April through October. I want to tell them, "HEY, I have a child too and I work hard for my money so that I can AFFORD to send her to college, not hope that through some "pipe dream" she'll be "discovered" by some Division II college softball coach and get a free ride. 
2. CELLPHONES IN PUBLIC:                                                                                                        Yes, I have one. Yes, I'm guilty.  But I'm tired of every one thinking I want to hear there cell conversation!   And, I'm tired of all the dumbass ringtones!  Please, the next time you're in a public place and your cellphone rings, go outside or away from people to have your conversation.  I don't want to hear the gossip or bitchin.
3. FAT WOMEN IN SPORTIN "MUFFIN TOPS";                                                                         You know the kind...can't seem to realize that they don't wear a size 6 anymore, but insist on trying to wear the same pants they used to wear.  Pants that when buttoned leave the fat roll stickin over the top of the pants like a muffin does around the paper.  Please, I'm no Lorenzo Lamos, so let's all accept our bodies and wear what fits.....
4. SANDALS ON MEN:                                                                                                                    When they're not on the beach, men need to leave the sandals at home! I'll let you in on a secret... I hate gross looking feet.   I've even dated a few good looking women who come to find out had gross looking feet and I've moved on.  Can't handle it. Men...here's a clue....you have fucked up feet. And...as you get older they get worse.   Have you ever seen the guy with the yellowish looking toenails?  Or with heels so dry there crusty, chapped, and even cracking?  Ugh! Makes me want to throw up.   Also, let's face it...most men aren't as into hygene as most women. As a result, we don't get pedidures or put lotion on our tootsies,  instead a man will go into a restaurant with some sock lint hanging out of the side of his right foot big toe....
5. ESPN RADIO:                                                                                                                               I'm glad we have a local talk sports station now, but I have to admit I can only take so much in a day's time.   Is it just me or does ESPN hire all the same personalities. Or do they have a training book which turns every one into the same personality?  Colin Cowherd, Freddy Coleman, Scot VanPelt (not so much), Bob Valvano to name a few all repeat what they say, way too much.  I mean you can listen to them introduce a topic and it will take them 15 minutes to get it out!  God, I go nuts!   You've also heard me complain before about how much they go on about the NFL draft.....Well, I'll bring it up again....There's not a day that has gone by since the draft that someone on ESPN radio hasn't had a segment "breaking down" the NFL draft.  GIVE ME A BREAK!   The draft is over, NFL camps aren't open....the draft is a crap shoot for about 75% of the players drafted anyway.....please let me enjoy some baseball or golf or FIFA soccer for awhile. The fall and the NFL season will be here before we all know it.             Oh,  and by the way ESPN, Lebron James is out of the playoffs, the NBA is a bunch of over paid, non caring athletes, who don't get called for fouls if they are a "superstar"
6. AMERICA'S FUNNIEST HOME VIDEOS:                                                                                  It's not like it's a weekly tradition around my house to watch AFHV, but every once in awhile when my daughter is over we will watch it. There's not too much "family" viewing on TV so you take what you can get.  Have you ever watched it when just after showing a video of some kid hitting a whiffle ball into his dad's nuts they pan the audience and the whole audience is laughing histerically. Laughing like they're gona fall out of their seats.  I'm mean the video is humorous, but I never seen one on there which made me want to fall on the floor.  What overacting.                 Even more so, last night I'm watchin it with my daughter. We had just played 9 holes of golf together, ate dinner, and were spending some tv time before putting her to bed.   Well, they put on a video of four old fucks. 2 men and 2 women who all had to be over 65 years of age with a tall thin glass of water. Grandma puts a big heaping scoop of baking soda in the glass and it starts to bubble up. Then Grandma #2 pulls out what looks to be a ballon and puts it around the top of the glass. Well, before you could react the "balloon" fills up and expands and turns out to be a condem which once full proceeds to blow off the glass and flies away.   Wow, that was so funny Grandpa 1 and 2 almost shit in their Depends. I guess they must have had a stack of'em and since they can't get it up anymore need another use for their stash of rubbers.   I'm dumbstruck.....lucky my smart daughter doesn't say anything and the show goes on. But, I'm embarrassed and thinkin "can't I even watch this program without some kind of sex relation coming into play"!     If you're a parent you know where I'm coming from.   If you're not, you're probably thinking I'm being dumb and overreacting.  But I'm tired of our society which has come to think that we cannot try and keep our youth innocent for as long as possible.
7. LAST GRIPE...THE NEIGHBOR'S WIFE:  I got this young couple living next door. They have 2 kids and seem like a happy family.  Probably are.  I just want to scream at the wife!            She doesn't work.....the toughest part of her day is getting in the car around 7:30am to take the 2 kids to school, then around 3pm to get in the car to go pick the kids up.....Other than that she never comes outside.....never does anything around the yard while everyone else is away. Instead, sad sack daddy who works til 6 in Salisbury has to come home and fire up the lawn mower.                    Here's 1 recent incident I'd like to share.   They decided to fence in their backyard. Bought all the materials, rented an auger for digging post holes, the whole works...Hubby's gonna do the work himself, but only has the auger rented for a week.  2 Saturday's ago he's out first thing in the morning and working.  Making good progress and around 6 hours later around 2pm he's still working in the hot sun. Sweat rolling down his back, shirt soaked......around this time I had been out for an hour or so myself cutting grass, pulling weeds, etc.....   Little missy pulls in the driveway with a bathing suit on covered by a sun dress....both kids get out of the car and go happily into the house....she passes by me just as a bead of sweat was rolling down my forehead and says "ShuHHH, IT FEELS LIKE I'VE PUT IN A FULL DAY!  I'VE BEEN TO LEWES, THEN TO MILTON, TOOK THE KIDS FOR LUNCH, I'M BEAT"   I actually stood there, politely smiled and shook my head, looked at the poor SOB being shook like a cartoon character by the auger, looked back at her,  looked back at him,  pulled the chord on my mower and proceeded on......Are you really serious!    Ugh!

I'm glad to get this off my chest! I feel a ton better!   Sorry I don't have more, but now I'm getting irritated with myself....

"Don't pull the vine, because the tree may follow"